The Meal I Wish I Hadn't Eaten...
CONTENT WARNING I warn you reader, do not contact Meatbeat Enterprises at the phone number 1-800-273-8255. It'll save you some healthy heart. WARNING: NSFW!! TURN BACK NOW OR YOU WILL HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!! WARNING: EXPLICIT LANGUAGE/BAD WORDS!!! TURN BACK OR UR MOTHER WILL SUCK UR DIK! JoeBee, the writer and reviewer. (talk) 05:35, January 14, 2019 (UTC) Chapter 1: THE CALL!! I wanted something to eat because I ran out of semen-stained Cheetos to eat. If you don't like those kinds of Cheetos you can go fuck yourself. Anyway, I called my local pizza restraunt Maggot Hut Pizza. Their phone number was 1-666-666-666. Here was the call: Me: Hey yo homies, you got pitza? Pizza dudette: Yea sure what kind Me: Cum-dripped Pizza dudette: Sir you're fucking disgusting, don't call this number again you beta cuck. Wow. I've never been so offended in my entire life!! I hate myself for calling this place. Suddenly some guy knocked on the door loudly. I got up from my couch and answered it because I was stupid. "Hey, I heard you're hungry, wanna bite to eat?" The stranger said. He was wearing nothing. "Ye!!!" I said. "THEN CALL 1-800-273-8255 FOR GOOD PIZZA!!!" He said. "OK!!" I YELLED BACK IN ALL CAPS. I called the number and ordered an item called a Semen Deluxe... weird name but I didn't think much of it. Chapter 2: EW!! '''SERIOUSLY, THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE TO CLICK OFF. DON'T READ FURTHER IF YOU HAVE A BAD STOMACHE, YOUR WILL SHIT BRICKS OUT OF YOUR ARSEHOLE. So the pizza guy came over to my house and I paid the $69.69 he asked for the pizza. Odd price and a bit pricey but I guess it's cuz it's a deluxe right (ohhh little did I know!!!). I opened the box and it had white gooey stuff all over it. I got turned on by it so I smeared it on myself and my pp went big. I ignored it so I took a slice and ate it. "GWOSS WAT THE FA IS DIS TASTE!!" I said. I continuted it eating doe so it didnt really matter to me. When I ate the whole thing I took the remaining white gooeey stuff and put it on my dickhole. It felt good so I kept doing it. I saw the same gooey stuff come out of my dick so I tasted it and it was gross still. But somehow i was turned on by it and did it for 12 hours straight until I got bored. I went to sleep and I woke up to the sound of somehow knocking. Who the fuckey wuckey was htat? I opened the door and... it was a hot girl!! I invited her in by saying "Hey i liek u wanna sex" and she somehow fell for it even doe that would never happen and she came inside. She took off her clothes but den I saw she was eating the same pizza i ate 12 hours earlier. I was like "woooey u like dat too" and she said "yee i do u too?" and i nodded. She took her shirt off and sucked my d, it felt good and came all over her asshole!!!! I was so happy and then she went to sleep in a bed. I forgot she was in bed so i accidentally killed her. I didnt know that i kileld her so i still snuggled veyr herd dat night. Chapter 3: OH MY GOD DIDDLY DARN I woke up and was shocked ot see she hadnt woke up somehow. I tried putting my d i nhers and den i reaized she was ded. I had comtted necrophilly and i was sad but also turned on. I left the house and slipped on my ass. My ass was shattered in two but i somehow managed to crawl to Meatbeat Enterprises Pizza. I filed a complaint saying dat it was not very good for health. The owner looked my dead in the eye and said... "I'm your father, you fucking bitch!" and he took the gun and shot me. After he shot me, i bled out on the pavement and I felt my lungs go through the transdeminsional rift and teleport into the alternate universe of this Earth. In short i fucking died. Dont ever go to this fucking place.